Monday, June 3, 2013

Let's bully 'em

The Worst Show Ever put on an interesting show that fired all five of us up.  Crank, apparently, has too much time on his hands.  He started the show out with his review of a reality show on TV called "Living Below Zero", a documentary, of sorts, about new age hippies living in the rough above the Arctic Circle. 

Before we go any further, let's make our stance clear.  There is no such thing as "reality TV".  It is all staged.  Does any sane mind truly believe that people who want to escape the drama of modern life would invite a TV crew to their community to document their daily lives?  Of course not.  The story is made for TV, and idiots buy into it as if it were the real thing. 

The conversation slowly morphed from the new age hippies to "furries", people who dress up, and act like, animals.  Crank even played a quip of a guy who acted like a dog. 

With the two stories involved, all three hosts agreed that weird people would be better served with a "punch in the face" because the weirdoes need to be kept in check.  We shouldn't have to play nice with them and they need to be bullied into behaving in the proper manner because insane is insane.

We couldn't agree more.  Weirdoes need to be bullied into their place. 

But let's put a dose of reality into the conversation, first.  The new age hippies, they are made for TV and are getting paid big bucks for their antics.  Losers, like Crank, are watching the show, which drives advertising dollars, and those new age hippies aren't stupid.  They are getting a healthy slice of those advertising dollars.

The "furriers"?  Heck, none of us ever heard of these people.  Our guess is that some desperate, or maybe mentally unstable people, have gone an extreme route to gain fifteen minutes of fame, and maybe some advertising dollars.  Not one of us five can say that we know, worked with, met, or passed in the Walmart, one of these "furrier" people.  We can say, unequivocally, that any person who claims to "lead a life of an animal" is plain psycho and we don't feel like we're being politically incorrect for stating the fact, despite what the morning crew would like us to believe.  Our conclusion is that losers, like Crank with too much time on his hands, actually discovered this "furrier community" and believed it to be real.

But we do like the idea the morning crew put out that bullying the weirdoes to keep them in check is a good thing.  That is why all five of us agree that every listener should call in to the morning show and ask the coffee girl to deliver a coffee, black, with plenty of sugar and cream on the side.  Lord knows she wouldn't be able to get the cream and sugar just right, so let's be politically correct and ask for the cream and sugar on the side.   

All five of us watched that documentary about the ginger kids.  Cartman had it right.  Ginger kids aren't right in the head.  But let's be politically correct and call in to the morning show and ask if the ginger kid wants some ginger snaps to go with his coffee that the coffee girl brings him every half hour.

For the hairless dwarf, or more aptly termed, hairless troll, let's be as politically correct as we can and ask him if he thinks he ever can achieve a better status of the penises he looks up to every day when he is asked to "look me eye to eye."  

Sorry, five thumbs down (we don't count the extra thumb on one of our reviewers) for this morning's show.  Start out your show with something people can relate to.  There's lots of things listeners can relate to other than the old guy holding up the convenience store line, or a TV show that was nauseating, or a news event that shows how far we have devolved as a country.  Maybe some mornings have a line in the convenience store running faster than one can put his purchase on the counter, a TV show that was particularly entertaining, or a news event that shows how far we have evolved as a society. 

Oh, yeah, we forgot.  Usually only the extreme and the extreme negative generates advertising dollars.  At least, that's what the experts in the industry tell us.

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